Tag Archives: hope

Let’s Give it All

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Let’s pretend, just one moment,
give me a moment
in silly fantasy,
pretend that nothing ever happened,
pretend you always
loved me.

Let’s pretend that there was no one else
as if the world
was barren.
Let’s give it a moment and pretend
that we are now
the two that we have always been.

Let’s give it a moment, spend it a wish
give us a chance to believe everything but this.
Give me a chance, let’s pretend we don’t know,
there was no past, no before.
Let’s give it all.

Let’s pretend
that we were
who we are.
Because who we are,
is perfect.

Even if only to us.

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Anyone Out There? (No More Star-Crossed Teens)

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Is there anyone out there,
unbroken, outspoken
with a smile on her face?

Is there anyone still out there,
who’s breathing and living
with every memory sacred of every day?

Let there be
a heart.
Let every song be heard
and harmony so sweet.
Let every moment be
a start.
A beginning so beautiful
that one cannot help but believe.
Let there be
an ocean,
to swallow every sorrow
that we leave.
Let there be
the moon,
by which the dawn may shed light
on every last star-crossed teen.

Let there be no more star-crossed teens.

Is there anyone out there,
with unwavering optimism
that this will all turn out all right?

Is there anyone still out there,
with a heart on her sleeve
that she would give for a price.

Is there anyone out there,
who might pay cost of love
to love her where she stands?

Is there anyone left out there,
with the comprehension bold
that one might still understand?

Is there anyone out there?
Do you believe that this
could ever affect you?

Is there anyone still out there,
with the believe in love
past every torturing, heart-wrenching rue?

Perfect

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In a translucent world,
tattered by shimmering expectations
glittering too cold, too sapphire sought.
Another devastation wrought.
Believe in more than what could be,
and yet you are perfect to me.

Destroy another, if you will.
But if you please, I see no ill.
Flawed to a fault inside your eyes,
but through my gaze, I spy another life.
Rose-shaded tint, perhaps this is so,
but need you more than tinted love?
If say I, believe I am true,
there is no man more perfect than you.

Surviving the Expiration

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Sometimes I wonder how I sleep,
with every moment captured in a dream,
haunting, tainting, captivating me.
Here I am.

Here we are.

I look upon you,
curious eyes.
How have we come to this?

I thank my God every day of my life,
whispered prayers He answered,
caught guilty in my selfish words,
but rewarded despite.

Might you take a moment to understand
that somehow you have taken me by the hand,
lead me to a different land.
Foreign veils of a new world.
How have we become those two?

They point when they see us.
We are privileged,
envied.
They are stolen by retracing steps,
and angry.

And riots of outrage,
must there be such turmoil?
We’ve not asked an opinion,
nor other emotions.
Must there be burning thatched houses
and poisoned wells
and cliff-diving resolutes
with frightful, furious spells?

Must there be a moment too soon,
where I may turn again to you?
May I not be always whole?

And on tongues sharp
with silver,
forks pitched in the air.
Why should this be so treacherous?
Why should anyone else care?

They told me
that this was temporary,
that you were lost to me.
That I shouldn’t breathe
a word more of your love for me.
They gave me a date
one, two, three, and more.
A date we would be torn apart,
and more broken before.

They spat curses of a silly monotony,
tedious to indifferent ears.
But how, why?
Perhaps, they’ve still not
lost those years.

And yet, gnawing at the back of my mind,
tearing slivers of my heart,
raking me with transparent claws,
their dates tore me apart.

They set fire to our hopes,
shot poison into dreams,
sent chills of nightmares into my darkness
and tortured me in my sleep.
Blinking lights
and heartbeat cry,
the thuds of a frightened child.
I listened, just so, tentatively
while they bribed, deceived, beguiled.

Am I holding on too tightly?
I wondered.

But this time, I’m looking up
face into the horizon.
My eyes cast amber by fires and pyres,
my skin dyed black by the ash.
But this time I’m vulnerable
and I’ll give it all,
if you just hold me still.

We outlasted the fire,
we cured the poison.
We kept strong as diamonds in coal
outlasted the words, and fought bold.
Here we are, less lost, less cold.

After months of preying plays on words
torturing to exasperation,
after they tore me into tiny pieces of myself,
we survived the expiration.

And now that I think of it,
we troubled not.

Burying All of the Evidence

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Ill with sharp suspicion.
A conscience guiding my intuition,
with ignorance,
tainted with a poison.
Flooding riverbanks, drowning innocents
setting black fire to the grass
scorching my slipping feet on coal-warm ash.

What have I done?

Thick veils of darkness cast in shadow.
No one will ever know;
but it was me.
A mask, ghost smile, lips pure white
blood stains on child hands
doused in poison to wash away
cold and angry;
spent and frayed.
And remain in poison
until so charred
that my fingerprints
have faded away.

So charred, they’ve burned black.

A knowing moon, a Cheshire moon
a white-tooth smirk spread wide.
He knows but silent on a useless tongue
and mocks me on a Harvest Moon.
Stained crimson with unspoken rue,
a travesty I have spent on you,
but unbetrayed by an accusing moon
whom weeps rain
in memories to you.

And I am sorry.

With shovel in grave, I fall into the earth,
gather myself and continue on as before.
Until eyes of the moon cannot see me,
have no bearing.
But I still feel guilty
as I fill this grave; condemned to
walk below the ground, beneath ash.
Beneath dust and damn, beneath contempt;
I bury you and this evidence.

And shall place no stone above this grave
that I and others may never remember.

Before you ask, no I didn’t kill anyone. And honestly, I haven’t done anything really bad in awhile. This is mostly just a release¬† of guilty emotions I’ve felt for a long time.

I’m sorry I haven’t been updating lately. I’ve been too busy. I’m going to try to update a little more often, if I can manage it.

Melt the Ice Away

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Upon bare feet tread smooth
ice-cold, soft-blue;
step after step–place each with care
frozen tundra before me, hoping he might be there.
But no one, not a soul, I remain alone.
Too far to try to return safely home.
With eyes cast below, staring into the sea,
a thin layer of ice between the ocean and me.
Days turn to weeks, I drown in the rain
suffering the heart for him that still remains.
Rubbed raw and empty, searching in vain.
Ears caught in illusion as his ghost whispers my name.
Only, he whispers again, a voice in the breeze,
a desperate cry that lingers, haunting me.
Over and over, my eyes lift from the ground;
before me, he smiles, without making a sound.
I run to him fast, far and away
toes slipping on sleet, I am nearly misplaced.
Scars scorch the ice, cracking under my feet.
Faster, I run, that they may not capture me.
Closer, I come, but after me still.
The cracks in the ice have one mind and one will.
But I reach him all the same, wrapped tight in his arms
spun on his heel, the whole world to discard.

But the sun peeks from the clouds, too soon to discover
the cracks become holes, our winter is over.
Around us, shines the sea as the ice melts away
a new dawn free of tundra, beginning this day.
He holds me tighter, moments soon, we will be drowned
with less and less ice to serve as our ground.
Kissed my forehead, promises forever, eternity with me
in Heaven, in Hell, together and strong, or at least we believe.
But when we look down, the ice melted away, our feet find soft earthy land,
an island, so small, that only we fit, alive by the sea, we still stand.

If Only, Though I Love You

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I fought the moment I lost inhibition,
Trapped behind the bars of intuition,
I watched you as you tread on path so broken
and left with nothing there when you were open.
Might be I travelled light, without much burden,
saw you in my path but let you stay hidden.
Forgot that you were there until you left me,
then noticed something wrong when you went missing.

If only as a kid I’d let myself see you,
if only in those days I saw what you’d been through,
there’d be so many less scars and memories to haunt you.
Here I was my love, I didn’t protect you.
If only as a kid, you’d seen my heartache,
if only you could have stopped my senseless heartbreak.
If only we were first, just us at daybreak.
If only we were kids before the hard tolls we must take.

I wish I had seen you before I knew him,
I wish you had seen me before you saw them.
I wish that we were us before we were now and then.
I wish we knew before that we were destined.
If only as children we flew kites above us,
if only as children we knew what love was.
If only as so young we sang the song love
and gave then all we had lain there before us.

But I ask far too much, I’m happy with you.
Would give up everything for this dream come true,
Don’t ever let me wake if I am not beside you
Because a love with you is better than love in youth.